CD Eskilson

Echinacea

Grayhead, avalanche, leilani:

our family portraits showcase

brilliant florets, how we speak

love with our bell-shaped tongues.

 

        How long we’ve persisted

        and thrived with proud stems

        towering in tallgrass prairie.

        Forgive me now for conjuring

 

unblooming, the imagery of

bouquets pulled and withered.

Thrashing blight hitting its peak.

Forgive me thinking that more

 

        metaphors remain for bodies

        cast as coneflowers:

        trans bodies bright and waving

        in an offering of pink and blue.

Forgive me—I know I should

be mild. Chamomile, smears

in some impressionistic landscape

art galleries pull out in June.

 

        I know that it’s uncomfortable

        to hear dried petals whisper

        let us be instead of giving

        into quiet fade, a color-sucking

 

tragedy. What language outside

simile compels you to see violence?

Forgive me pleading grace

when I owe none

 

        but to my elders, siblings, sisters

        so much larger than a poem,

        owed much more than poems

        but their roots and earth below

 

them. What’s blossoming and full.

Forgive me for all I could be doing,

what I do that’s not enough.

Forgive me making our grief into

 

        meadows, for thinking if I offer

        something pretty

        people will not look away—

CD Eskilson is a trans poet, editor, and translator. Their debut poetry collection, Scream / Queen, is forthcoming from Acre Books.