NOTES ON INTIMACY

washing my roommate’s
spoon that’s been inside my roommate’s
mouth, tell me
what’s it like to believe in love?
hard to take you seriously within this font
the day we met at the lake I knew you were the ____
limbs of me fogged & bloating in the water
equally I identify as
a crunchy plastic wrapper
a misophonic uncle
—I am not fun or good at adventure
this just indicates how strongly we vibe
a plush nitrile glove goes tap tap tap
on the sink of my cheeks, the loop of my mouth
so lost I could chew through the hood of a car
I believe they call this resilience of some kind
I want you to respect me on a literal level & I know that’s not
easy, I know we are just strangers eating popcorn
on your couch,
& in many ways I am culturally ugly
like tramp stamps, or
Putlocker movies,
in the throughputs of power
I found your name,
& some days I fantasize
about getting fired
about falling into a lake
about watching little bears knit bras on the sidewalk
where a woman dressed like me cries into her phone
& I hope someone helped her, but
like the rest of us
she won’t get the hang of this until it’s over